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This interesting article was written by Tunde Ajaja and posted in Punch..Read below…
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This interesting article was written by Tunde Ajaja and posted in Punch..Read below…
S*x has been described as one of the activities that boost closeness in marriage, but the lack of it, or its inadequacy, can equally be detrimental to the success of union.
This all-important activity is so vital that marriage counsellors and psychologists often advise couples not to joke with it, for the sake of keeping their homes together, even if they have to prepare a timetable for it, so that the needs of both parties can be well taken care of.
Meanwhile, s*x is only good when the two persons enj0yed the act and reached cl!max (ej*culation for men and org*sm for women), but findings have shown that in most cases, men reach org@sm in about 95 per cent of their s3xual activities while about…
25 per cent of women reach org@sm in their s3xual encounters.
Mrs. Motun (surname withheld) is one of such women who could count how many times she has reached org@sm on her fingers; even with that, she won’t go far on the first five fingers.
“And you know the irony there, my husband and I have s3x at least thrice a week, but he’s the only one who enjoys it,”
She continued,
“Perhaps there is something wrong somewhere. It has almost become a norm and it is an issue you can’t talk to anyone about, so as not to be labelled as being wild. After two to three minutes, my husband ej@culates and that is the end. And the most annoying part is that he sleeps off shortly after.
It can be so annoying.
“Initially, I thought it was normal, but while interacting with people, I found that a woman can also reach org@sm. Maybe because I didn’t have experience about s3x before I m@rried, so I didn’t know much about it. The situation has made me to lose interest in s3x because he puts me in the m0od and leaves shortly after.”
Out of frustration of being left hanging after every s3xual activity, Motun confronted her husband on the need to satisfy her as well, but was shocked when her husband told her “I’m trying my best.”
Mosun, a mother of one, is one out of millions of women who rarely or never reach org@sm, as evidenced by the responses of women who spoke to Saturday PUNCH.
It wasn’t an issue many of them were willing to talk about, because it is considered a taboo for women to discuss such a topic in public, but those who spoke to our correspondent expressed their frustration and more importantly, the fact that they are helpless.
Even though reaching climax or not has no impact on women’s ability to conceive, it has a lot of impact on how much they enjoy s3x.
It is therefore helpful to decipher why many women don’t reach org@sm.
Here is the reason.
Here is the reason.
Men are able to reach org@sm quickly because the nerves that trigger that intense pleasure are located in the glans (the rounded part forming the head of the p3nis), thus, its stimulation, usually through rubbing the vag!nal walls during int3rcourse, helps them to ej@culate in ‘record’ time.
But for women, those nerves that should drive them to reach orgasm are not really in the vag!na where they can be stimulated during s3x; they are located in the cl!toris, which is located at the anterior end of the vvlva, or say towards the north (upper) part of the vag!nal opening.
Due to the location, the cl!toris, which is female’s most sensitive zone, is usually not directly stimulated by the p3nis during int3rcourse. Thus, a large number of women are not able to cl!max, even if the s3xual act lasts for a longer time.
According to previous studies, s3xual activity is usually between 33 seconds and 13 minutes, and understandably, some men could take longer before they ej@culate, but regardless of the length of time, a number of women may still not reach org@sm.
Therefore, it is for no hidden reason that women who are unable to reach org@sm get to that destination when their cl!toris is st!mulated by mere hand, simply because that is where the nerves are.
According to a consultant endocrin0logist, Dr. Olamoyegun Michael, the primary reason women don’t reach org@sm through pen3trative s3x is the inadequate stimulation of the cl!toris by the male org@n during s3x.
He said some women actually do reach org@sm but that a significant percentage of women don’t reach that peak and that it is as a product of so many factors. He said even among those who claim to reach that level, some fake it to s@tisfy the man or not to puncture his ego.
He added,
“Cl!toris is located at the upper part of the vag!na wall. And because of that location, pen3trative s3x may not drive it to org@sm in some women, unless you use some other means.
“However, some women can reach org@sm through pen3tration, depending on the experience of both of them, how roomy the woman is, how big the man is, the technique and some other factors. So, it is not hidden that cl!toris can affect their ability to reach org@sm or its frequency.
“That is why in the olden days, when women were c!rcumcised, which is the removal of the cl!toris, the belief was that those who were not c!rcumcised could be promiscuous, and that goes to show that the cl!toris is very sensitive and is important in female s3xual sat!sfaction.”
He explained further that the cl!toris can be likened to a man’s gl@ns, noting that contrary to some beliefs, cl!toris does not grow with age. He said the cl!toris only expands in size when st!mulated due to the increased blood flow.
He stated, “It is not that cl!toris grows with age and it doesn’t mean that the size of the cl!toris in a 10-year-old is the same with that of a 35-year-old. No. It grows, but that increase is related to st!mulation.
“Just as it is in men, when the male org@n becomes more turgid during s3xual int3ercourse due to the increased blood flow, the same thing happens to the clitoris.
When it is st1mulated, blood flow to that part increases and it expands the size, length and its sens1tivity. And the rate at which it will expand varies from one person to another, just as some w0men release flu1d in their gen1tals after reaching org@sm while some don’t.”
Overall, Olamoyegun maintained that when it comes to pen3trative s*x, the p3nis may not reach the cl!toris well enough, because of where it (cl!toris) is located, but that through other means, like manual st!mulation, women may find it easy to reach org@sm.
Notably, there are many routes to s3xual sat!sfaction (org!sm), including st!mulation of n!pples, the earlobes and k!ssing. And once the woman’s er0genous zone is explored during that activity, it takes them to that destination. But given these options, some women still do not reach org@sm.
Olamoyegun explained that women who have previously been s3xually abused, or are being abused or maltreated by their hus bands may find it difficult to reach org@sm and those who are frigid (inability of a female to respond to s3xual st!mulus) may find it difficult to reach org@sm because of their past experience.
He noted that those who have worries, challenges and those who have financial issues may also find it difficult to c limax because of their state of mind.
He noted that those who have worries, challenges and those who have financial issues may also find it difficult to c limax because of their state of mind.
He added,
“Some wom3n are frigid and such people are usually tensed. Thus, they don’t enjoy s3x, let alone have org@sm. That could be a product of previous s2xual abuse or r@pe. It is the same experience when the woman is being abu sed by the man. In addition, there are other medical conditions that can cause it, like diabetes, but there are drugs that can help that now.
“Then we have economic factor, which also applies to men. When there is no money, s3x might be the last thing on his mind. So, for a woman too, if there are domestic or other issues on her mind, s3x might not appeal to her.”
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